Dear Postpartum Me

Dear Postpartum Me,

I know right now things probably feel overwhelming and just hard.

You might be exhausted in ways you didn’t think were even possible, both physically and emotionally. The days probably blur together, and there might be moments when you feel like you’re not sure how you’re going to make it through. But I want you to know something important: you are doing an incredible job. It’s okay if it doesn’t always feel that way, but you’re doing the best you can—and that’s enough. You are enough.

The transition into motherhood is a lot, and the way your body and mind are adjusting can sometimes feel like it’s too much. The physical recovery, the sleepless nights, the constant need to be “on” — it’s a lot to bear. There will be days when it feels like you’re not in control, like you’ve lost your sense of self or that you’re no longer the person you were before. But take a deep breath. You’re not lost. You’re evolving.

First, remember that it’s okay to ask for help. You don’t need to do this alone, and you shouldn’t have to. Ask for a break, reach out to friends or family, or talk to a therapist. Leaning on others is not a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength. And don’t forget that it’s okay to say ‘no.’  This is a time to focus on healing and adjusting—so give yourself permission to rest. Accept that the house will be dirty, laundry still hasn’t gotten folded and put away, and dishes are still in the sink. It’s okay. This moment is temporary, even if it doesn’t feel that way right now.

Secondly, be gentle with yourself. I know that can sound like a cliché, but it’s the most important thing I can say. Your body has just done something incredible. You grew a tiny human, and then you brought them into the world. That’s huge. There may be moments of frustration when your body feels foreign, or when you look at yourself in the mirror and don’t recognize the person staring back. Take a moment to appreciate everything your body has done. Your journey of recovery is unique to you, and it takes time. Don’t rush it.

Third, give yourself permission to feel all the things. Some days you might feel pure joy and love for your baby, and other days you might feel anxious, frustrated, or downright sad. That’s okay. You’re not supposed to feel “happy” all the time. It’s normal to experience a range of emotions, and it doesn’t make you any less of a mother. What you’re feeling is valid. Trust that your emotions are part of the process, and don’t be afraid to express them.

Lastly, hold onto the little moments. I know the days can feel long and the nights can feel even longer, but there is so much beauty in the smallest things. The way your baby’s hand curls around your finger. The soft sound of their breathing when they finally fall asleep in your arms. The way they turn their head toward you when you’re talking because they know your voice. This time is fleeting—though it may feel endless now, one day you’ll look back and realize how quickly it passed.

Remember, it’s okay to have hard days. You don’t need to be perfect. But know that you’re not alone, and you don’t have to go through this journey in isolation. You’ve got this. One day at a time, you’re becoming exactly the mother you’re meant to be. I’m so proud of you.

With so much love and support,
“Future” You